How To Identify Idiots….

Is it just me or is this business of identity getting out of hand…??.. It’s ridiculous…. Everyday there are more and more pronouns added to the “list” … Who keeps up with this stuff…. Better question… Who the hell makes up the shit for these lists….??…

The whole gender identity thing has pissed me off since day one… People walking around…identifying as things they are not…should only be classified as one thing…..

 

Fucking idiots…..

If you have a dick…you are a man…. Even if you get your dick cut off …you’re still a man……

If you have a pussy… you are a woman… Even someone glues a dick to your pelvis bone… you’re still a woman…..

If you are neither man nor woman or better yet…you identify as both… you’re an asshole… Only hermaphrodites should be able to have the flexibility of identifying as both….

If you are non-binary… you must also identify as otherkin…since that is what’s needed for the extra chromosome. …. If you’re human….you have to have forty six chromosomes and forty six is an even number …Even if you argue that we have twenty three pairs of chromosomes …and twenty three is an odd number… you’re still wrong… because 2+3=5 and five can be divided into two groups of two….And even numbers need a two… XX is two letters… XY is also two letters…XXXY is four letters which is still an even number….See…it’s math….

Otherkin…. If you claim to be part animal then you must prove it by eating a proportionate part of that animals diet…If your half dog….you’d better stock up on Pedigree…Same applies to the part cats and their Friskies…. This is easy with dog and cat food…. Please let me know where you are finding dragon chow though… I’ve looked everywhere…. If you identify as alienkin… I can relate…..But for different reasons…  You think that you have come from another planet and can’t fit in here… I can’t believe we are on the same planet…. I do find it curious that not one alienkin has ever returned home….

Food… You cannot….I repeat CANNOT… identify as food… For many reasons…. First off…. you’d be eaten…. Secondly …even if you weren’t eaten….you’re shelf life would be very short… making your actual life very short..?…I’m not understanding this… what happens if you identify as milk…??. You’re going to expire relatively soon…. If you identify as food… you can’t keep changing your identity…That’s not being true to yourself… The only way that you could stay alive is to identify as a McDonald’s hamburger… Those things last forever….

Furniture… You can’t identify as a piece of furniture unless you stay in one spot until you starve to death…..If you move…. You are only trying to get attention….

Car or Truck…. Granted…there are times when people allow their vehicles to play into their identity…. (Monster energy stickers on a raised super shiny 4×4 with not one speck of mud comes to mind….) however… you are not allowed to identify as a vehicle of any kind unless you are willing to piggy back all of your friends around… Even the fat ones….. You also must remain outdoors during shitty weather unless you have a garage….

A tree or plant…. Again you have to remain stationary until you starve to death….Look on the bright side…People water plants.. so your chances of dying of thirst are much lower than one that identifies as furniture…..

Those are a few examples of why identifying as something other than yourself is idiotic… Face it… those people really just want to feel special because they are finally reaching adulthood (in most cases this is only by numerical default) and they are realizing that they are not as unique and special as they thought they were going to be…. that is why we have this onslaught of gender identity crisis…..

Maybe one day it will come to an end… In the meantime… Question it….  and remind them that doing what feels good is not the same as doing what’s right… (like getting a job… being productive and not wasting another fucking minute not knowing who you are because you’re not only trying to be someone else….but something else….)

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